Top ten comebacks for someone who always plays the victim (2024)

We’ve all met the person who plays the victim. They love to waffle on about their woes and how they’ve been mistreated by the world.

Victims never accept responsibility for their own actions even when they were the person who started the drama and continued to stir the pot. They refuse to believe that their behaviour is contributing to the negative results that they are getting in their life.

Being close to a victim can be emotionally draining. They gravitate towards people who are nurturing and who will listen like a therapist and be their personal cheerleader.

Bad stuff happens to all of us. You may have had a parent die, been in an accident or have been laid off, which are all out of your control. You are not responsible for the situation. All you can control is how you respond to the event.

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What to say to someone who always claims to be the victim

1. If everywhere you go there’s a problem, guess what?

2. Some people create their own storms and then get upset when it rains.

3. Some people try to make other people feel responsible for the way they feel.

4. When you don’t accept responsibility for your actions your life can’t change.

5. It is always easy to blame others, it is much more productive to figure out how you ended up in this situation.

6. Blaming others takes energy away from improving yourself.

7. You can stop playing the victim now, everyone bought it.

8. You play the victim so well you should carry around your own body chalk.

9. I think it is funny how you are still playing the victim and blaming others for things not going your way. When it’s your bad choices that got you where you are. Grow up!

10. You can only play the victim card so many times before people figure out that you’re the problem.

Definition of someone who plays the victim

Someone who plays the victim is a person who continuously portrays themselves as a victim of circ*mstances of other people’s beahviour or actions. They often claim that they have been treated poorly by others, even when they are not actually being victimized.

These folks can use their victimhood as a way to get attention or sympathy from the people in their life. It is a great excuse to avoid accepting respsonsibiity for their own actions.

This behaviour can be manipulative and cause friends and family to feel resentful towards them.

We can all choose not to be a victim of our circ*mstance

Humans are different than other species in that we have a choice, the power to control our reactions and attitudes towards our circ*mstances. While we can’t always control over what happens to us, we can choose how we respond to it. If we take responsibility for our thoughts and actions, we can avoid falling into the victim mentality and instead focus on solutions and growth.

Yes, that’s right. Our mindset and our attitude play a crucial role in how we navigate through life’s challenges. By taking on a growth mindset, we can view obstacles as opportunities to learn and improve ourselves, instead of feeling helpless and defeated when life knocks us down.

As adult’s important to take ownership of our thoughts, actions and behaviours, and not let external circ*mstances dictate our lives, even though it may feel easier to blame others for our results.

By focusing on what you can control and taking proactive steps towards your goals, we can create a better future for ourselves.

We have a choice to play the victim or stand up and face our challenges

Most people in Liz Murray’s circ*mstances would have played the victim card, both her parents were heroin addicts. Growing up in poverty in New York City, she had to steal food to eat, she was constantly dirty and had head lice. The kids at school bullied her relentlessly, as a result, she started skipping classes and then dropped out of school altogether. To top it all off, when she was 15, her mother passed away from AIDS. Liz’s father couldn’t pay the rent and Liz became homeless and lived on trains.

One day she made the decision to turn her life around and completed 4 years of high school in 2 years. Liz then went on to win a scholarship to Harvard University and went from homeless to Harvard. We all have circ*mstances in our life that suck, we also have a choice how we deal with things.

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Famous people who have been accused of playing the victim

It’s not really fair to label someone as “playing the victim” because we don’t really know what goes on behind closed doors. Several celebrities famous have been accused of playing the victim in the media.

1. Taylor Swift: Taylor Swift has been criticized for portraying herself as the victim in many of her songs. Some people think that she uses her breakups to her advantage, and creates conflicts with other celebrities to gain sympathy and sell records. It seems to be working!

2. Johnny Depp: Johnny Depp was accused of playing the victim during legal battles with his ex-wife, Amber Heard. Many people feel that he is trying to paint himself as a victim of domestic abuse in order to salvage his career and reputation. Amber also portrayed herself as the victim in the situation in the courtroom.

3. Lindsay Lohan: Lindsay Lohan used to have tumultuous career and personal life, and has often portrayed herself as a victim of the media and Hollywood. However, some people feel that she has brought many of her problems on herself through her own actions when she was younger. She has since grown up, moved to Dubai and had a child.

4. Kanye West: Kanye West has been known to play the victim in his many public feuds with other well known people in the media. He has often complained about being misunderstood and unfairly treated, although a lot of people think that he brings a lot of the drama on himself through his own controversial behaviour.

Again, it’s important to remember that these are just examples and that it’s not always fair to label someone as “playing the victim” without knowing all the details of their situation.

The Role of counselling and self care

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When you are dealing with someone who always plays the victim and you find it stressful, consider getting support from a professional. Talking to a counselor is a great way to work through a challenging situation, and help you find some strategies to work through the person’s behaviour.

Better Help is a great resource where you can talk to a counselor from the comfort of your own home.

Taking care of your own needs isn’t selfish, and you will feel better in the long run.

Got any comments, questions or tips for dealing with someone who acts like a victim? Share them in the comments below.

Top ten comebacks for someone who always plays the victim (2024)

FAQs

What to say to someone who is always playing the victim? ›

Things to Say to Someone With a Victim Mentality
  • “I'm sorry that you are going through this. ...
  • “I have about an hour to talk if you'd like to try and figure things out.”
  • “I can't solve this problem for you, but I'm here to help you through it.”
  • “I care about you but we seem to be rehashing the same things over and over.

What do you call a person who always plays the victim? ›

One of the ways that gaslighters/narcissists exert their power through playing the victim. In relationships, gaslighters play the victim in order to manipulate and guilt their partners into doing their will. On a global stage, when gaslighter “plays the role” of a victim, it takes on a different tone.

What are words for someone who plays victim? ›

What is another word for victim playing?
self-pityfeeling sorry for oneself
crying gamebeing a baby
pity playhelplessness
being a drama queenbeing a crybaby
self-indulgencepity seeking
3 more rows

How to respond to a narcissist playing victim? ›

Here are a few tips to consider if a narcissist is playing the victim:
  1. Try not to take it personally. This is never easy, but with practice you can do it.
  2. Don't take the bait. If possible, walk away every time they treat you like the bad guy.
  3. Don't internalize it. ...
  4. Don't idealize them. ...
  5. Don't engage.

What is the word for playing victim all the time? ›

Playing the victim (also known as victim playing, victim card, or self-victimization) is the fabrication or exaggeration of victimhood for a variety of reasons such as to justify abuse to others, to manipulate others, a coping strategy, attention seeking or diffusion of responsibility.

What is it called when a narcissist plays the victim? ›

Victim syndrome in narcissism is when narcissistic individuals act innocent and manipulate situations to receive sympathy, deflect accountability and/or responsibility, and to portray themselves as unfairly treated,” explains Natalie Jambazian, LMFT, a Los Angeles-based therapist specializing in narcissistic abuse ...

How to deal with someone who plays the victim in a relationship? ›

You can deal with a partner playing the victim by not accusing them, creating space for yourself, not getting emotional, changing the subject matter, and not being a constant fixer.

What do you call someone who always thinks they are right? ›

An ideologue is someone who has very strong beliefs or opinions and stubbornly sticks to them no matter what. An ideologue will insist they're right even when evidence suggests they might be wrong. If you call someone an ideologue, it's an insult.

How to break a victim mentality? ›

How to Stop Being the Victim
  1. Take responsibility. You are the only one who controls your actions. ...
  2. Self-care and compassion. Victim mentalities are subconsciously adopted as a way to cope, often from past trauma. ...
  3. Start saying no. You can say no to something you don't want to do. ...
  4. Educate yourself.
Mar 11, 2024

Why do manipulators play the victim? ›

A manipulative person may play the victim to get what they want. A person who authentically opens up wants to feel understood. A person who plays the victim actively manipulates others by attention-seeking, inflicting guilt, and evading accountability.

How to respond to victim blaming? ›

What Can I do About it?
  1. Challenge victim-blaming statements when you hear them.
  2. Do not agree with abusers' excuses for why they abuse.
  3. Let survivors know that it is not their fault.
  4. Hold abusers accountable for their actions: do not let them make excuses like blaming the victim, alcohol, or drugs for their behavior.

What is a word for victim blame? ›

Synonyms: disapproval, condemnation, criticism , reproach, finger pointing, censure, reprobation, imputation, complaint , depreciation, chiding, rebuke , reprimand, objection, derogation, attack , repudiation, incrimination.

What refers to a person who victimizes others? ›

Definitions of victimizer. a person who victimizes others. “I thought we were partners, not victim and victimizer” synonyms: victimiser.

What is a positive word for victim? ›

The top 10 positive & impactful synonyms for “victim” are survivor, overcomer, thriver, fighter, endurer, champion, hero, resilient, trailblazer, and beacon. Using these synonyms helps you enhance both your communication and psychological resilience in several meaningful ways.

How do you deal with a partner that always plays the victim? ›

You can deal with a partner playing the victim by not accusing them, creating space for yourself, not getting emotional, changing the subject matter, and not being a constant fixer.

What is victim narcissism? ›

“Victim syndrome in narcissism is when narcissistic individuals act innocent and manipulate situations to receive sympathy, deflect accountability and/or responsibility, and to portray themselves as unfairly treated,” explains Natalie Jambazian, LMFT, a Los Angeles-based therapist specializing in narcissistic abuse ...

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